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Sunday, May 26, 2013

Persistent dreams

Barney & Clyde


Even though I’m in my sixties, I still have a dream like this. I’m back in college (either as a college student or as an older adult, come back).  I’ve forgotten that I’ve registered for course X (varies; often a philosophy course – and I only took one philosophy course).  The final is today. Or maybe there’s a term paper due, and then a final. If I flunk, they take back my degree.

Why college? Why not grad school or high school? I think that’s because I was more time challenged and schedule challenged in college: working multiple part-time jobs, each with its own schedule. Debate tournaments the might be Saturday, Saturday and Sunday, Friday and Saturday, or even Thursday through Sunday. Classes meeting at odd hours in order to maximize use of scarce room availability. And in those days I didn’t carry a Franklin planner or Daytimer, and the Outlook calendar with 15 minute reminders was far in the future. I tried to keep all these responsibilities in my head or on scraps of paper. Miraculously, I almost never messed up. (I’m sure I did, but I don’t remember forgetting anything.)  Still, the stress was tremendous and the fear that my adult life would unravel was a real fear.

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